(might be triggering❤️)

If worst comes to worst I can always starve myself...Could I blame someone for not helping me because of their own worries of never being thin? They shouldn’t stop me from being my best self or make me feel bad and yet they are the ones who taught me:

- how to look at myself in the mirror (your arms are big, your teeth are yellow, you’re fat, etc.)

- how to dress (don’t show off or wear tight clothes, you’ll look like a hooker)

- how to act towards them and others (be passive, unattached, cold)

-eating habits (haven’t you had enough or that?)

But the only person who taught me how to love myself (which as you can see I’m having trouble with because of them) was my grandmother...my parents would gaslight me when I was younger to control me but I now know how wrong it is and try to avoid it when I can...but I’m just hurting so bad 😭