Hey guys, this might not get read. I've never written one of these before, but I need someone to talk to/need opinions on. My fiancé of a year, and best friend/boyfriend of 4 years, has pretty much been banned from my family. He and I had an argument a couple years ago over text, but quickly resolved it in person and were able to kiss and make up-and actually grow stronger from our fallout. My parents, unbeknownst to me at the time, had been monitoring my text messages, which includes reading them. Now we don't talk dirty or sext, no drugs or alcohol, and didn't do anything sexual-so I had nothing to hide in the first place. But my parents read our arguments and deemed it abusive. It was just a normal relationship argument I don't recall what it was about. We both said things we regret and apologized for and talked to our church pastor about and were able to grow from our mistake. but my language was overlooked by my parents. They focused on his language in the argument and granted me unwarranted amnesty from their current vehement hatred towards the man I love with all my heart. (Keep in mind this was a couple years ago.) also, several weeks after the initial episode, our families decided to try to sit down and talk things out rationally. My father yelled, his dad (retired police and retired military) kept calm and cool throughout the interrogation. At one point, the tensions climaxed into my mother grabbing at my financés throat and trying to strangle him in front of us.

During the time leading up to this, I would come home with bruises from bumping into the squat rack at the gym, and one from volleyball.

My parents assumed he did it, and no matter how many of my friends tried to explain or how many times I tried to attest their I'll-advised conclusions, I was called a "liar." I'm currently 19- my father yelled at me last night trying to get my attention (I was upstairs in a far room and didn't hear). He proceeded to come up the stairs yelling "how about I hit you and give you bruises and call you a "bitch"?! Will that work?!" Keep in mind, my fiancé has never done these things, he would never hurt me, yes he called my attitude during our argument "bitchy", but it was. I called him some distasteful adjectives that I regret 2 years later. But, nonetheless my parents will not move on from something they shouldn't have known. I wish they weren't reading my messages, my mom loved my fiancé almost more than I did (weird, I know but true.) my parents have a bad habit of latching onto preconceived ideas and sticking to them. Anything they hear or see can be warped to adapting to their perceptual set. It's brought me pain and heartache. My mother has tried to manipulate me, my father has threatened me, and I've felt unsafe in my house. I live on campus at my college, but it's too close to my parents' house. They drive by my residency halls to see if I'm there or not. My best friend, who liked my fiancé before we started dating, has been brainwashed by my mom into believing her fears. My BFF and her boyfriend and mine would have the most fun together until my mom tried to talk her into getting me to break up with my boyfriend/fiance.

It upsets me over how much my parents and friends "worry" about me and are hurting over things they shouldn't. My fiancé led me to being baptized, he teaches Sunday school at our church, he taught kids how to swim, he has a passion for Christ and an undying love for me. He has filled me with a love that is beyond me. He gave up his passion as a professional soccer player for me, he pursued me for 2 years (one he was aboard in Europe) and knew we had something special. I knew the moment I met him in high school we had something special, I just didn't know what it was. I do now, and it's a deep passionate and irrevocable love for one another. He's a sweet amazing man that treats me as his queen, he is everything I never knew I wanted. I can honestly say I am truly, truly blessed to have him in my life- despite the trials and tribulations that have been placed in our path.

Anyways, I could probably write an extremely long message on this-not even the tip of the iceberg-just hard to write about on an iPhone.