I post this at 1:30 in the morning, the day of his first birthday. He has never been good at sleeping, we gave him a bottle to fall asleep every night just so we could get rest, and around 10 1/2 months he was generally sleeping through the night (9-5 A.M.)....

Then a storm hit us... I started working for the first time in almost a year, he started daycare with an unfamiliar care giver, he caught the flu, he’s still currently teething, we took him out of the routine of his caregiver and had my S-I-L watch him over winter break (all within three weeks).

The good news is, he’s healthy finally (other than teething), tomorrow we start daycare again regularly, his sister will be there to ease him back into the routine.

I just don’t know how to get him on a night time schedule. I need sleep. I feel so exhausted 100% of the time, I can’t focus at work or at home, and I’m angry all the time.

We share a room with my son, so letting him cry it out wasn’t a feasible option when my husband was working. So as of tonight, I asked my husband if we can sleep out in the living room and allow him to cry it out for a week to train him to sleep through the night. Well, he slept from 8-11, cried a little, and then around 12 A.M. until 1:30 I let him cry it out. He NEVER GIVES UP. Just when you think he fell asleep or can’t cry anymore he catches a second wind and cries even LOUDER. So I’m feeling guilty like maybe he didn’t eat enough, maybe he pooped , maybe he’s wet, maybe I’m traumatizing him by suddenly letting him cry it out. 😩😩 can we say guilt??? So I quietly change his diaper, it’s full of pee. I lay him back down but he’s lost it again. I made him a 4 oz bottle with only half the formula to wean him out of night feeding. He screamed for just a second when he finished and then passed out.

Am I doing this right? What can I do better? Am I missing something? I feel so hopeless, and I need sleep! I feel like this is so unusual for a one year old to not sleep through the night!!

sincerely,

Exhausted Mom.

P.S-happy 1st birthday baby, I still love you lol)