Fingering

Hello! I need help. Whenever I try to finger myself during masturbation, I can't seem to ever get off and instead of it feeling good, I eventually get bored and it starts to hurt. I want to buy a sex toy to see if a dildo will be better but I feel really embarrassed. O usually get off during clit simulation but I want to explore other things. I'm afraid that when I have sex that it won't feel good.

Thank you