Lost my beautiful son a day before c section

Was supposed to have my son January 4 but had him the 3rd. I went in the 2nd he wasn't moving and they said he was fine I knew he wasn't. Next day no movement and I was in pain and went again. He had no heart beat and I had a c section right away. My baby boy was full term when they took him the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck twice and again around. His body. I don't know how I'm going to handle this I'm broken carried him 9 months someone please give me tips I don't even want to live I have anxiety depression and bipolar and it's getting worse I am making an appointment to get better meds and a therapist. Please tell me what's some things I can do this is the worst thing someone can go threw