I don’t think this is ever going to happen for me 😔

M.S. • My husband and I have been married for 9 years (together for 15) - high school sweethearts. We would like 3-4 kids but honestly I’m afraid it won’t happen, as I am 32 years old. Praying to be blessed with a positive pregnancy test, healthy pregnancy, and

Was super excited last cycle and this current one that it would finally be my time. (I have PCOS).

Since going on thyroid hormone a year and a half ago my cycles have become more regular — no more going MONTHS at a time with no periods. My cycles are just longer than the “typical” 28-30 days. But 2 months in a row I’ve gotten positive ovulation tests beginning on the same day of my cycle (day 30). Last month I got the high fertility result followed by a peak result. This month I just got 4 or 5 high results and no peak - or if I would’ve gotten a peak I didn’t see it because after 4 or 5 highs I just decided to quit “wasting” test strips since I must not be ovulating this month or something. Was hoping the new year with the full moon and the fact that I have an endocrinologist appointment literally once my “2 week wait” would be over and was hoping I’d either be finding out on my own that I was pregnant or asking for a blood test there to find out. But I bet I will have the complete opposite and be heartbroken again at my appointment and angry that AF is here instead. Last month around the time I was getting the positive ovulation tests, I had TONS of INTENSE physical symptoms (chest incredibly full and sore, LOTS of cramps, bloating, etc). This time I had kind of sore boobs, a little bit of cramping but just on the one side. So frustrated. I read in the instructions insert that sometimes you don’t get a peak because you didn’t ovulate and sometimes the LH is there but just too low for the test to pick it up. Blah. Hoping I’ll be shocked and get pregnant anyway even with minimal symptoms and no peak (that I know of), but positive that won’t be the case. I’m just over this. 💔 I wish and pray to have a baby my the end of the year, then get to the point that it’s just praying to be pregnant by the end of the year. Not looking for sympathy or attention or anything - just needed a place to vent.