What am I so unhappy with my life? I have everything I ever wanted, I moved from a shitty place3 years ago, started college, learned English. I got rid of most of my acne and met someone who doesn’t cheat on me, and doesn’t hide anything from me. But I still not happy with our relationship even though he’s the best guy I’ve met. What turns me off it’s his lack of motivation in life, yes I know he has ADHD and depression. I have depression too but I’m trying hard here to get out of this shitty darkness. He has everything he could ask for, he’s 25, graduated from college on the major that he wanted, he has a car, it’s smart, doesn’t drink, looks fine. His mom likes me, we hang out. But he’s impatient, he doesn’t know quite a lot about how to be a gentleman. Still he drives 45 minutes back and forth to see me. He cares about me not being sad, he made me cry because I felt self conscious of him not giving me oral sex and he agreed to give me oral sex. He said that appart from getting a job that he liked he wanted to make me happy. But he doesn’t make me happy :(. But still when I try to break up with him I start crying because I don’t want to leave him. I don’t know who’s the worse in this relationship and I don’t know if our depression it’s gonna end up destroying each other. I want him to make me feel happy but I can’t make me happy :/ what the hell do I want?

Is it because he’s an average American man with a normal functional family and I’m adopted living in public housing, walk to college and take the public bus? Is it our social difference that I don’t like? What’s my fucking problem.