When I was pregnant I told myself I would have a healthy, whole food filled, Byron Bay-esque pregnancy filled with fresh fruits, vegetables and nary a donut in sight. I went as far as to foolishly verbalise these exact words to my husband one pre-morning sickness morning despite having been brought up with the phrase ‘least said, best mended’. By 7 weeks my morning sickness was so bad mashed potato became my best friend as did the gentlest form of exercise known to man – ‘moving from couch to bed, repeat several times per day to complete a full set’. With each day that passed my whole food craving faded shadowed only by my desire to try each new flavour of the ‘donut of the month’ at my local bakery – Ferrero Rocher was a clear winner until a post pregnancy Lemon Meringue filled magic passed over the threshold. Although I didn’t put on much weight other than the round belly I had been sporting - my body drastically changed in shape, size and for lack of a better word – texture.

It seems that anyone you encounter and speak to are advocates for the mantra of self acceptance, acceptance of my slightly heavier frame and love for my extra dimples. I am all for ‘self acceptance, self love and appreciating your body for what it has created’ BUT it is not wrong to crave the body you once had.

The flat belly and hips that fit in your jeans.

Or skin that didn’t wrinkle when you bent at the waist.

I know it is important to appreciate every mark or lump and bump that resulted in your tiny time waster (baby) but isn’t it even more important to be happy in your skin and if not, change what can indeed be changed? I am in no way advocating obsessing over the body you have. I love each mark stretched across my belly, love the slightly wider set yet womanly hips, I don’t want to lose what I have gained as a somewhat badge of pregnancy honour after our fertility battle, I DO however want to better the body I have been left with and not for anyone but myself. For me, the Mum bod acceptance involves losing a few extra kilos I didn’t lose whilst breastfeeding and being able to run 5Km without keeling over – I couldn’t do this pre-Ellie but what better reason is there to get healthy than to set a healthy example for my little lady.

Healthy does NOT mean skinny, doesn’t mean you need to go from the size you are to a perfect sample size or vice versa, it doesn’t mean eating like a rabbit and filling up on water – Healthy means being happy with the body, the mind you have and most importantly the image of yourself you have. If to you this means losing some extra weight, gaining some, spreading tan over your stretch marks or wearing crop tops and showing them off, having perfect hair, shaving your head, wearing spanks or letting your body be what is it – Healthy is where you feel most comfortable. Love every bit of yourself from toes to mind and if you don’t, know you have the power to change it whether it be an extra few steps on your way to work or meditating about self acceptance. Every bit of you is brilliant, every bit of me is brilliant and every kilo gained or lost is worth it if it makes you happy in the end.