The frustrations of a bipolar woman

I will be the first to admit that my emotions are a hot mess when I'm PMS-ing, let alone my bad days. I am bipolar type 1, meaning have more highs than lows.

soooooooo when the 2WW starts it gets nuts. I have now nailed down that all of my PMS symptoms are pregnancy symptoms at their earliest.

My breasts swell about 4 days out, and by "bleed day" I can't wear a bra it get so painful. My swings get insane and I could start crying at an ASPCA commercial before the you even hear the song... I have back problems so it acts up and doesn't help my moods. I mean, we even have a "when Meg is on her bleeding rampage" food list. hahaha We both have a weird sense of humor. The gas, constipation, smell sensitivity (it sucks living in Milwaukee during the summer on that front) are all in full gear a-go.

the "you are having your period" stuff? I don't bloat much until day of, and cramps are not a thing until day 2-3.

After 11 months now of negatives, how on Earth do I even keep doing this?

I'm sorry to complain, I'm hitting a wall and it's draining me. My husband understands, he's way to loving and less analytic about this than I am.

TTC, why are you so annoying?