AF (not) due next Tues. Confidence is slowly subsiding

I've been so optimistic about this month being our month until today. Idk why, but I all of a sudden just feel the need to accept that we probably won't get our rainbow baby this month. I've been cramping, nauseated, extremely fatigue and my appetite has been crazy. Boons started to feel demi tender yesterday and today. There's been so many signs lately, besides the physical, that's had my mind racing with possibilities. But I'm just so scared of getting my hopes up and being let down another month. Plus, I've has a few health issues going on that makes me believe that's what my body is going through, and not developing my perfect little baby to be 😧. Just feeling a little blue and needed to vent. I pray things go in our favor. Baby Dust all around.