So this is my first post since my last post in a very very very long time. Could be a year I think. But I'm just here to update on my struggle with PCOS. Since my first symptoms manifested around age 18 to an official diagnosis eight years ago, about to be 29 in a couple months, trying everything possible. Even after being hopeful about vitex, I've decided to throw in the towel. Particularly because of the feelings of inadequacy and having to cover up my issue. My partner and I are no longer together. Some men don't see you as valuavel if you can't give them a child and I can't endure the trauma of it with another man. So I've given up trying and dating all together. I'm back on contraceptives, simply to allow my body to have a period every month. Most days I'm either too depressed to take it or I simply forget. As if the mental, emotional and physical agony hasn't been enough these past ten years, I'm now in a spiritual ditch. I can't help but feel like God must really hate me *** tears flowing as I type this *** I just want to wish all those TTC mamas success and to all those who are about to be mothers or are mothers, blessings infinite. I'd give anything in the world to experience just an ounce of the joy you are experiencing right now. I'd trade lonely nights like this for cries at midnight and a set of tiny feet of my own in a heartbeat. You guys are blessed!