I don’t like myself anymore...

I had a baby almost a month ago and I hate my body now. My belly is loose and if i wear jeans it cuts into my belly so it looks even worse. I breastfed for 2 weeks and pumped after that and my boobs look saggier than they did before I gave birth and that’s after having 2 kids already before. Now I’m scared to breastfeed or pump for my next child because what’s next? My boobs are just gonna get saggier right? I’m scared to eat. I barely eat anymore because I feel so fat that I’m scared to get bigger and I rather starve myself than to gain anymore weight. I feel like shit... I truly do not like the body I am in anymore and it’s making me depressed.