My father loved being a pastor for more than 50 years. One day he received a phone call from his next door neighbor, laughing hysterically. Her 6 year old son had come running wide-eyed to her and breathlessly exclaimed, “Mom! Pastor is mowing his grass with no clothes on!”

Knowing that her pastor was not outside mowing his grass with no clothes on, this confused mom quickly went to her window. There was Pastor innocently taking care of his lawn as anyone else would—fully clothed. Why would her son think the Pastor had lost his mind—and his attire? She looked at her confused and upset son, and noticed something she hadn’t noticed before: he was squinting. When she looked back out the window, she realized Pastor had on tan colored clothing. Then it dawned on her: her son needed glasses! His vision had become blurry. What a mistake to make because a child’s vision was out of focus!

Has infertility caused your heart to become blurry? It is so easy to focus on nothing but having a baby that you lose sight of relationships that are precious to you. We can’t see all the wonderful things we love about our spouse. We only see negative pregnancy tests. When you want a baby so badly, and that desire is delayed, it can be easy to obsess on sperm counts and ovulation days—and forget how much you really do love that goofy sense of humor or the cute dimple in your sweetheart’s chin. Infertility has caused our vision to be out of focus.

If your vision has become blurry, I challenge you today to focus on your relationship. Choose a day when you know conception is impossible, there are no doctor’s appointments, and when you are certain that you will not ovulate. Recreate your first date, or perhaps the day you got engaged. Go back to the days when you didn’t know infertility would be your constant companion. Focus on what it was that drew you to each other. Find whatever it was that God thought was such a good idea that He put the two of you together. Enjoy each other completely for a day, and set your focus to let each other feel loved.

(And one more thing: when working in your yard—wear brightly colored clothing!)