So guys... I swear if it wasn't for u guys uplifting me while I was pregnant with my son. I'm thankful for. U guys. Well throughout my pregnancy my son's father and I didn't get along at all. Well sadly when my son was 2 months 12/2016 his dad ended up and jail and he's STILL in there. He should be getting out soon and we have been working on us getting being a family since May 2017. But I'm so afraid of going through a repeated cycle. He freaking left me alone to deal with my son to chase this ugly bitch and get high and be careless and mind you he's 35. The closer it is for him to get out of prison, the more nightmares I have and it sucks. It's sucks bad because I do want us to be a family and I don't want to love him but it's hard. A lot of people are saying it's jail talk and then it's like should I atleast give him a chance and hold my guard up just incase all fails. I'm so sad and it sucks because we were doing so good. I was just happy 2 days ago but the closer we get to that release date my anxiety and fear starts to kick through thinking about all the shit he put me through in the past. Has anyone gone through this and been successful in a happy, trustworthy, healthy relationship? Please let me know. I really need some advice. My heart is torn that this is happening right now