Hi ladiesss,

Im gonna try and explain my situation with as much detail as I can but I’ve been with my boyfriend for 6 months.... and everything in the beginning was great! I’m 24 and he is 31. From the beginning my boyfriend was very clear in what he wanted out of our relationship.... and he set the cards on the table telling me “I want a baby, and I know you might think it’s too soon but I know what I want and I want you to be the mother of my child.” I was obviously kinda taken back but I knew that’s what I wanted as well I just didn’t think it was gonna happen so quickly. I’ve been wanting to be a mom since I was a little kid, deep down in my heart that’s all I’ve ever wanted! I told him yes but that it wasn’t gonna be easy because what was I suppose to tell my parents? My parents wanted me to do things right and get married and then have kids. The next day he came over , talked to my parents and told them our plans.... he even told them “I wanna marry your daughter!” I was so shocked! He even got me a ring! Everything was going perfect! We tried for about 3 months and BOOM, I am now 12 weeks pregnant!

But....

Everything started changing of course he was sooooooo happy when he found out I was pregnant! He was beyond thrilled! Here is where things started taking a turn .... my fiancé is a security guard.... he works at a dispensary.... 9am-midnight Monday’s & Tuesday off works Wed, Thurs, Fri’s, Sat, Sun. (All day) sometimes he even has to do graveyard where he has to stay until 10 am the next morning that’s almost a 24 hour shift! It’s been really hard because I knew all this when I met him, but it’s been getting really really difficult because I never see him anymore. He recently doesn’t work and is gonna started working again starting next week so this whole time he’s been resting at home, spending time with his family , his daughter , his sister etc... but yet he only comes and spends 3-4 hours with me twice a week only? What are you doing the rest of the day ? I can come with you ? Ya know ? Idc. There are times where he doesn’t even call me all day , until the next morning and goes MIA for 24 hours and calls me the next morning like “hey babe! How are you ?” Like wtf ? “Where have you been? You couldn’t pick up the phone for like 2 seconds out of the 24 hours in the day to let me know your okay “yeah I’m fine , im alive!” SOMETHING????? He’s done this to me more than 3 times and has left me wondering “are we even a priority to you? Do you even care?”

So fast forward....

Your probably wondering “well what do you mean double life?!!”

My fiancé from the beginning told me “I have a daughter. But she’s not biologically mine.” My fiancé has a sister and she’s a drunk... she has two other kids and court system was gonna take this child and place her under foster care, so my fiancé stepped in and claimed her as her own since she was about 1 (she is 3 years old now.) I’ve meet this sweet little girl once (literally once) I have not met his dad or his older sister .... i have met his mom and and his younger sister & they are the sweetest people ever.

So,

Ever since I got pregnant I asked him... “so are we still getting married?” (Obviously I didn’t mean now asap but at some point in the future after the baby is born.) and he said “I don’t see marriage at all, I’m sorry but right now is not the best time.” Kinda hurt my feelings tbh. I live with my parents currently .... and he has his own studio apartment.... he comes and visit me 2 a weeks maybe for like 3-4 hours and then goes home .... (to do what you may ask?) I have no fucking clue. He goes and hangs out with his sister sometimes , goes to his dad’s house, picks up his daughter, spends time with her.... etc. I’ve asked on soooooo many occasions.... “CAN I COME?” He says no cause he has soooooooo much to do... “I CAN HELP YOU WITH WHATEVER YOU NEED ? I DONT REALLY CARE AS LONG AS IM SPENDING TIME WITH YOU.” He says “no babe your pregnant just stay home and rest , take care of our baby and yourself.”

I’ve honestly been wondering for the past 2 weeks ? Why can’t I just tag along? Like I don’t care what we do? I don’t even care if we are doing simple things ... I just wanna spend time with him. What are you hidding ? Why haven’t I met the rest of your family ?

I feel like I’m dealing with this pregnancy alone. I hardly ever see him at all and if I do... it’s only 3-4 hours.... 2 a week. Ladies .... give me some advice ....? I don’t know what to feel or if maybe I’m just over thinking everything ? I’m I crazy ? I just want a little bit of love and for him to be by my side . I feel like he puts his other daughter first and his family and I’m just last.

I’m completely confused ladies. He wants me to understand him but who understands me ? I feel neglected tbh. We both did this because it’s what we both wanted ! And now I feel like he’s kinda low key backing out. I have so many questions and a lot are unanswered. At this point if he doesn’t see marriage ...? Are we ever gonna move in together or are we gonna be living this whole your at your parents and I’m in my own studio kinda thing and live apart ?

I feel like there is a lot more I left out but this is just some of it? Ladies ? What do you think?