Valentine's Day double date 😒 Would you?

Question

Ok, so long story short. My in-laws both live off disability so the little money that they do receive, goes towards bills etc. They never really go out to eat, unless my husband, brother-in-law or sister-in-law pay for them to do so.. Well they watch my niece & nephew for free, but my sister-in-law buys them food & stuff to make up for it.. So in all honesty, they really don't have to worry about that kind of stuff. 
Anyways, so my husband offered to his dad that they both could come out to eat with us on Valentine's Day & my husband will pay for them, if they agreed to watch our son one night before the baby is born, so my husband & I can have a night to ourselves. My only problem is, l don't think we should have to shell out $60+ to bring them out with us, just so they'll watch their grandson, when they watch everyone else for free.
 I'm to the point where I honestly don't care if I'm rude anymore about it, they put the other 2 kids on a pedestal just because my sister buys them shit & gives them money for bills if they're short. Idk I'm sorry this is so long & thanks to anyone who has read this far, I just don't have anyone else to complain to about this. 
& my husband did tell his dad that it wasn't set in stone yet, because he had to ask me, but I don't want to look like a huge bitch for saying no, because his dad will know that I said no? 
Ugh drama 😑

Answer

sounds like they watch the other kids for food not for free technically.  sounds like a nice thing to do by taking them out instead of just expecting them to watch baby for nothing.

Answer

Personally I believe in giving back and I wouldn’t care if they are doing the same thing for others for free. The point is they are helping both of you (you and your husband) by watching your kids. Is $60 a lot for you guys at this point of life? I would definitely asked them myself to join us for dinner.

Answer

I think it's a nice gesture. They don't get to go do things ever, so why not help out..and instead of it being a handout, they are returning a favor...I'm sure they would probably still babysit for free..but why not take them to dinner? I'd love if we could take my in laws out, but they always insist on paying for everything.

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Take them out for dinner, thank them for watching your kid. Seems fair to me

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Like the above comment said, if money isn't tight then it's nice. Valentine's Day is just a day that doesn't have to be celebrated on that day. Id understand if the in-laws were huge assholes but he wants to do something nice for his parents. One dinner won't hurt.

Answer

Wowwww....that is not very nice of him to put you in a situation where you have to be the bad guy. Totally not cool.  Just don’t say it’s okay if it’s not okay.
Why can’t they go out with you on another day? Or, if it has to be for Valentine’s Day, he can give them a gift card to a restaurant and they can go themselves. 
And in the future, he ought to quit making commitments before he has talked to you about it. 😒

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Are they on disability bcuz it's truly needed or are they working the system? I think that's a fair question. I'd be irritated too if I felt like they were more leeches.....I wouldn't care about the Valentine's Day part of it. 
Maybe stay in for Valentine's Day and cook dinner for everyone. It'd be way cheaper!

Answer

They obviously have a different relationship with your SIL than you. That makes the relationship with your children different. That doesn’t mean they love your kid any less. If they are the primary childcare option for your SIL and she pays them in groceries that they depend on, I understand why watching her children over yours would be a priority. They aren’t obligated to watch your child and they depend on your SIL for more than you so they are required to watch her kids, their dinner literally depends on it. Look at it this way, if they were at work and not able to watch your kid would you be mad? No. Watching your SILs kids is their job. If your husband wants to take his parents out to eat he should be allowed to. Maybe it would actually make ya’ll closer so you wouldn’t feel the way you do if you made more effort and spent more time with them.

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I don’t see the issue
It doesn’t matter what other people do. On an individual standpoint it seems fair. I take you to dinner, you watch our son for a night out. 
I try and not live my life based on the actions of others. Totally not worth the energy. 
If you are this hung up on it, hire a baby sitter. Everyone should have a sitter they trust to call upon. It will likely cost less than a fancy dinner out for an extra 2 people anyway

Answer

If they are on disability because they HAVE to, not because they can use the system them I don’t see why not.