deeply sad, depressed, and confused

I started miscarrying at my wedding reception, and lost the baby a day and a half later in mid November. I was 9 weeks, but I was told the baby stopped growing at 5 or 6 weeks.... my December and January period we're only about 2 or 3 days and completely lacking any clotted blood. Before the pregnancy I have always had a 5 day, heavy to light period, always regular, always the same, since my 1st period over 10 years ago..... Now here I am after ttc the last 2 months unsuccessfully, and am due for a period and am not having one, have take a bunch of tests, all negative.... woke up thinking AF was here this morning but only got a bunch of EWCM..... and another negative pregnancy test....... I am still sad over having lost my baby and sad I am not conceiving again. has anyone been through the weirdness I am going through?