Advice?

I’m sad. All the time. Some days I feel like I’m happy until I see myself in the mirror and I look into my own eyes and I see the sadness and then I start feeling sad again. And it’s not like an “empty sad” (even though I get like that sometimes) it’s a “I want to cry” sadness.

I haven’t had the best life growing up, and I have almost no friends (no one to talk to). I’m 19 now. Also I feel alone and need help.

I’m not suicidal, I just want to live in this world. I just feel like I’m existing.