My son was born a little over a week ago and my husband’s family flew in from across the country to meet the little guy. I was a little nervous because my SIL can be a little overwhelming and self-absorbed at times, but we have a pretty good relationship. Throughout their stay, my SIL would make little comments about how she was “the baby whisperer” and how good she was at changing diapers. Her boyfriend is also a grad student who studies childhood development, so she was constantly giving me “facts” about our newborn (for example: her bf did a study that concluded babies look more like their fathers from an evolutionary standpoint. When both my MIL and I said we didn’t know the validity of this, she got upset).

As a very new mom struggling to learn about my baby and adjust, I found all of this a little frustrating because it was making me feel inadequate. I casually mentioned it to my husband and he said he agreed that it was a little annoying.

On the last day of her visit, I noticed she was very withdrawn. She slept the entire time she was at our place and complained about being tired. I was concerned, but I also had my baby to worry about, so I didn’t think too much about it. My husband also thought it was weird, and said he mentioned to her the day before that she should cool it with the bf facts, but we both thought nothing of it.

Today I received a 10 (!) paragraph email from her saying how hurt she was that I was “complaining about her nonstop” and that I’m trying to take away her happiness about being in love with her bf. She also went on to say that she has never felt she could be herself around me and how rude I am to everyone in her family. I was shocked and so upset— not only because she feels this way and has never mentioned it until now, but also because 1 week postpartum seems like the worst possible time to start a fight!

My husband says to leave it alone and let her cool off. And honestly, I don’t have time to worry about this now, but I still feel so sad about it.

She’s also removed herself from my son’s shared photo stream, which seems like such an overreaction.

Very frustrating. Thanks for letting me vent!