The honest truth is that marriage is one of the most challenging human relationships. There is always work to do and sometimes it feels like that work is not getting you anywhere. Sadly in most cases I feel that women we get to do the most work because of our nature to understand and handle the emotional side of things better than our male counterparts.

I have been doing a lot of reading on marital reinvention because after being married for 12 years going on 13 years, I feel that I have sacrificed and given up a lot to make my marriage successful but have reached that point of realization where I must reevaluate.

I have been marriage to my kind and good hearted husband since I was 23 years old and have two beautiful boys aged 11 and 6 years. I have given my all to my marriage and family at the expense of myself and done most of the work if not all work to keep the marriage afloat. But I have reached a point where my husbands love and no work from his part (and his admission to not working on the marriage) can not cut it for me.

I found this article below and thought it enlightening enough to share with other people who may be in a similar situation. I determined our marriage to be on stage 5 which I believe is the most challenging and requires well thought analysis as it can lead to choosing to settling down or not.

The below stages of marriage are quoted from the Psychology Today's website article on Marriage Reinvention by Hara E. Marano.

The Six Stages of Marriage

1. Romance (Honeymoon) Fusion

2. Expectations Compromise

3. Power Struggle Control

4. Seven-Year Itch Competition (regardless of time married)

5. Reconciliation Cooperation

6. Acceptance Collaboration

Hope it helps to self evaluate oneself and marital relationship.