should i write him?

Question

my real dad walked out of my life before i was old enough to remember him. hes in jail now and wrote me a letter, 18 years later asking me to forgive him and write him back. all along my mom married a great guy who ive called dad since he adopted me at age 5. i love him and i feel like if i write my real dad then it would be disrespectful to the man who raised me. what should i do..?

Answer

Your real dad is the man who raised you and took care of you. The sperm donor is probably just lonely because he's in prison. If people love you, they are there for good times and bad times.

Answer

I can’t give the best advice because I was never in that situation.  I do have a friend whose dad never wanted to be in her life and then he Facebook messaged her out of the blue and wanted to get to know his “daughter” she declined and went to tell him she has the best dad in her life.  
I think it all depends on how you feel.

Answer

He’s just writing cause he’s in jail and he’s probably lonely he’s probably let down so many people and now he has no one and is trying to reach out to everyone he’s hurt cause now that he’s alone he’s hurt this is a tough one but it’s up to you at the end of the day outweigh pros and cons is it better to let this person in your life or will it be a stress on you or hurt you or your family in any way

Answer

I agree with the rest... he's only reaching out cause he's lonely in prison. Your dad raising you IS your real dad. The guy in prison was only a sperm donor. He waited so long if he wanted to know you before he would've. Sorry you are going through this!

Answer

Do what you want to do. If you want to write him back, sit down and talk to your dad about it. He might be supportive.

Answer

No.... I didn't know about my biological father until the age of 15, I grew up with a step dad, that i never knew as a step... I regret it to this day that I was curious, I suffered a lot of heartache and it still effects me as a 30 yr old woman with two kids. I wouldn't bother to be honest =\.

Answer

I would say don't write him, like everyone else said, he's probably just lonely in jail. You have your dad already, he's been your dad since you were 5.

Answer

Do what feels right to you.
I am having a baby whose father will never even meet her and it breaks my heart.
Just know, that it isn't your fault. Your mom must love you so much. Anyone can make a baby but it tastes a special person to be a parent- and your biological father is not your parent.

Answer

i can totally relate .. my mum met my dad who raised me from 6months old.. my sperm donar reached out to me after not hearing a word from him for 18yrs .. i felt so guilty for my dad and felt like i was hurting him by talking to the sperm donar .. anyways long story short sperm donar is a dickhead which i worked out quite quickly .. and he thought he was entitled to walk me down the isle at my wedding. hell no wasnt happening .. you cant just walk into my life after all them years and expect to be dad .

should i write him?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey