alright, sorry about the long post but, I need y’all right now.

Background: my bf is 28 and I’m 24, I met him when I was living in Texas last year, and right after thanks giving we were fighting pretty bad. At one point he actually broke up with me so I made arrangements to go back to California with family, and he wanted me to come back to Texas (also for work,) so I did, and he helped pay for the gas that got me here and got us a place. He’s VERY religious and I am SO not.

So, my boyfriend and I have been fighting not frequently, but when they do occur it’s bad. Like he’ll “speak sternly” to me for hours while I just shut up and sob because I don’t want to fight. They usually occur because he starts speaking to me with attitude and saying things that are pretty hurtful, and I get upset and I’d rather be alone so I try to separate myself from the catalyst of my stress (him) to avoid sending myself into an anxiety attack. When we’re fighting he does things like question my character, suggest that I am promiscuous, tell me that I have terrible judgement, calls me over dramatic, and says that all of my issues are in my head. When things are good with us they’re great, but I can’t seem to find the safe space with him to express that my feelings are hurt without triggering his asshole side. Please help! I don’t want to give up!