Im going to post this anon, bcuz for my sake, nd more. See this isn't something I wanna share because I never thought it would happen to me. But 2 days ago I met someone for the first time it was at my college he said He wanted to get to know me chat and more. I said ok, he liked video games, I liked video games. I just wanted to chat. I stated no sex. I just want to chat. I just got out of a relationship, he said I understand. Once I closed my door to my dorm he became agressive, hugging tightly, trying to kiss me. He was attractive so I let the hugs nd kisses go. But then he was forcing my pants down, an i was saying no. I was saying im uncomfortable with this. We just met. He pushed me onto the bed and there i felt uncomfortable, naked, embarrassed. I thought ok. Were just going to lay here and watch a movie. he snuck a condom into his hand pulled down he pants and said Were going to fuck. This is were I know I went wrong. i should have gotton up but at this point his body weight is twice as much as me, nd he pratically ripped my underwear off of me. Nd forced it in. I yelled in pain. The pain shot up my body, nd he covered my mouth with a pilliow an told me shutup. So I laid there upset, my moans were cries, nd groans of pain. I grabbed him, scratched him, pushed him, nothing was happening. I felt to hopeless. I laid there numb. I laid tere shocked, hurt, I felt sick to my stomach, i felt like throwing up. This wasn't a competition. He had already won. I lost all energy, I felt as if it was my fault.. that if i tell someone. I would be judged. He was flinging me into different positions nd i'd crawl to say stop but He wouldnt. I collapse flat nd he'd try and Push me up or grab my legs. Even though id try kicking. After all was done i laid there. he put on clothes i laid under the covers, hurt, shocked, shivering. nd he was smiling because that is how he got off.. he didnt care. I told him I said why would you keep going if i told you To stop. He said i dont know i thought it was getting better, but your saying i basically raped you huh? i said yes. he said OH WELL IM SORRY. now i feel bad. Like wtf. now he's rejecting everything. I have told no one im scared i dont have evidence. i just want to write this. to let it all out. Im still not feeling good.