I’m 17 and I recently lost my virginity. It was an unplanned, spur of the moment thing that lasted about 30 seconds before we were going “oh shit” because I wasn’t on birth control nor was he wearing a condom. I didn’t get pregnant, but I learned my lesson and I’m now on birth control. Other than the lack of contraceptives, I don’t feel bad about having sex. I love my boyfriend and he loves me and I never had this moment of “oh god I’m not a virgin anymore.” It was more of a “huh... well that just happened.” I told my dad a few days after it happened and he took it really well. Basically just talked to me about it and we discussed birth control methods. He said that he would call my mom and only tell her I want birth control, not that I had sex (my parents aren’t together). Except then he told her anyway so now not only was she pissed that I had sex but she was also pissed that I wasn’t the one who told her. From the beginning of my relationship my mom told me that she wanted an open line of communication between us and we had even discussed situations in which my bf and I had fooled around. Except this time was waaaay different. Every time we have talked about it she has really done her best to let me know how disappointed she is in me and how much she disapproves (which is pretty hypocritical considering she lost her virginity right after she turned 17 and graduated high school pregnant with me). Even my stepdad gets in on it. They make snarky comments and my mom gave me this whole speech about how her first time lasted about two seconds because she freaked out and cried because she broke her promise to god and how my step dad waited till he was 20 because he didn’t want to run the chance of being a teen parent. She asked if I regret it and seemed utterly baffled when I said no. one on one dates with him have been banned indefinitely and it just really feels like they want me to feel full of guilt and shame and regret. I still don’t feel bad about having sex but they way they’re treating me because of it makes me feel really bad and i don’t know what to do.