Husbands almost 40 and his mom takes care of the bills..help!

I’ve had it with my husband. I feel like he should take responsibility for his own finances, he prefers his mother to pay the bills over his own wife. His mom tells me he gets overwhelmed with the bills so she does them for him...I tried doing them myself by blocking her out of our account but now he let her back in and I feel crappy about it..as if I’m the cause of all this. Am I wrong for thinking that she’s babying him and he needs to be a man and suck it up already??? He has a little meltdown everytime I ask him to call one of the billers or schedule out a bill on his own..With his mom in our account we don’t have financial freedom, I get judged for every little dime i spend but I never spend a dime without my husbands consent but get this..whenever his mom asks about it he throws me under the bus and makes me look like I’m in the wrong so he plays dumb when he really knows what’s up. I don’t want his mom knowing how much money we have and what not..she makes it seem like I’m not trying to help him at all. What do you guys think?