I do but I don’t

I’m not sure if I’m pregnant yet, it’s a huge mess. I got this app because I was a week late but got a negative and now I’m having a very not normal period. This happened on my last pregnancy so there is a chance that I am pregnant.

My husband wants to be done with two. I want two more. If I am pregnant it was an accident. Of course I want another baby but I was hoping for a spring baby. I’m not selfish, I just struggle with seasonal depression and having a baby in the winter would make it much worse. I’m also worried if I’m not pregnant he will still tell me no more kids. If I am pregnant he will be happy of course, but If I’m not he will probably continue telling me no.

My emotions are going haywire right now 😞