Where is the pressure truly coming from?

Question

So this isn’t the most controversial of questions, but I do think it could be interesting to hear everyone’s thoughts. 
I see posts on here frequently about women who feel they are expected to lose the baby weight quickly after pregnancy. They feel that others around them expect them to lose the weight, and if they don’t, they feel ashamed. Personally, I never felt like anyone cared if I lost the weight or not. I worked very hard to lose my baby weight after my daughter was born, but my main goal was health, not being slim (though that’s always a nice bonus!). However, that’s clearly not the case for everyone. 
Poll question-
Where do you feel the pressure comes from to get back to pre-pregnancy appearance? 
Other questions-
Do you think others truly expect us to “bounce back” or is it us thinking others care?
Do you get upset seeing others bounce back quickly, or feel happy for them (I see so many people that hate on others for losing the weight quickly)?
How can we change the idea that our body is supposed to be back to normal (whatever normal is🤔)?

Answer

Whenever I say I need to lose weight I get “Your baby is 4 months old. Relax.”
So for me, it’s coming from myself.

Answer

I think it’s a mix of a few things 
1) how some women get lucky and bounce back in such a short time on their own. 
2) how you go from your “normal” self to gaining weight and then look like a deflated balloon all in such a short time (my personal experience) 
3) we are always so hard on ourselves 
I know when I first had my baby I didn’t care at all. I was actually really happy with the way I looked. UNTIL, I came back on this app and saw all of these 1 week pp girls with flat stomachs and wondered why I didn’t look like that 😂
Now I’m 6 months pp and I’m feeling eh about myself. But I’m trying not to beat myself up about it 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

I don't feel pressured to lose the baby weight. My focus after giving birth was to stay healthy for myself and my LO, and losing weight was just a nice bonus. ;)

Answer

Aside from seeing the posts about the asshole husbands/SOs who say that they need to lose the weight or else they won’t be attractive anymore...I think most of the pressure comes from the individual themself. I was pregnant once and I was freaking out about how I’d look after. But that’s not because of society or whatever. I’m not influenced or controlled by what others think. It was all me. I don’t understand how people can blame society for any of that. It never made any sense to me 🤷🏻‍♀️

Answer

Myself. I think media actually shows women post partum pretty 50/50, and I also am intelligent enough to realize that for most famous people it's their jobs to look good, that they have personal trainers and chefs/dietitians- so of course I shouldn't compare myself to them. My spouse likes my body the way it is, no matter what, and often tells me to stop being so critical of myself, and does a good job at acknowledging that I've changed, but that he likes it. My family think I've done great, and look great, because a few family members drastically changed after giving birth, so I'm doing pretty well. I am my worst critic by far, and want to desperately get back into the shape I used to be even before getting pregnant. Mostly I want to feel better and have more energy, which in general only affects myself for now. I really want to be able to keep up with my daughter as well, which means I need to work on my stamina- which was pretty much destroyed by having a risky pregnancy that caused me to rest a majority of the time. So, yeah, I think it's mostly myself who's being a critic.

Answer

Mostly myself and a little from my Mom. I pressure myself to get back into my pre baby clothes as soon as possible and to lose weight so I will be healthier. 
My mom has always been into dieting and being healthier. She was once obese but is now a healthy size 6. She only puts a little pressure on me out of genuine concern for my wellbeing to be healthier.

Answer

you create your own stress and you decide what is going to control you and your driving forces. people can say negative things but ultimately you choose how you respond and what you do with it.

Answer

Myself, but I want to be healthy and fit. There's nothing wrong with pushing yourself for your health.

Answer

I have never felt pressure from anyone but myself. I have always been in shape and knew that after I had my son my goal was to loose the baby weight. People were never rude and if anything complimented me. For me it was my own self imagine of how I wanted my body to be.

Answer

For me the pressure was from myself but I compared myself to women on instagram a lot. I remember looking at my belly in the shower 1 day after giving birth and being shocked that I still looked 4 months pregnant. I was like no no! That should be gone! I've seen women on instagram who have their abs back! I bounced back pretty quick thankfully, but I was so freaked out that I'd look like that for good. 
I'll be more relaxed about it after this baby and trust that it'll happen in time. I want to look good for myself and my partner, nobody else commented on my weight. You spend so long being pregnant and giving up your body, there's nothing wrong with wanting it back. I won't be embracing the extra weight or any stretch marks.

Where is the pressure truly coming from?

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