So lately I've been thinking about birth control and how much it's seriously affected me.

Constant pain, random periods ever other week, loss of sex drive, dryness, headaches, painful sex...

And the list goes on..

My husband is in the military and he recently came back from a six month deployment.. So he's been very clingy because he hasn't seen me in six months, which I don't mind.

Last night we got a little drunk and he got a little horny which led to us having sex.

He seemed very into the moment, I could tell he was very into what was going on, he was even being a little rough.

The entire time we were having sex my body was going through many different angles of pain.

Of course I waited for the breaking point to stop him.

And began to cry.

I cannot stand what my birth control has turned me into.

I'm not the same person anymore.

Mood swings like crazy, insane amounts of pain...

I CAN NOT TAKE THIS SHIT ANY MORE.

Today my husband went out of state for the rest of the week to go skiing with his friends.

(I was able to take the most relaxing bath ever!!!!.....until the pain came back..)

But he started to text me that he missed me.

And of course I start to cry.

I was so afraid that he would be so against me getting off birth control

I was even surprised that he thought I would be mad that he touched himself

Are you kidding me, I cannot provide... So I'm happy he's at least pleasing himself.

God knows I can't...

And now I'm sitting in bed with lots of pain, missing my husband, and dreaming of a happy life.

From now on, I WILL be in control of MY OWN BODY.

If your prefer BC I completely respect that.

As for someone who is experiencing alot of issues, it's time to say good bye.

Sorry for the rant guys, I'm truly just depressed right now.