UPDATE: 

My period came after 53 days, fml, but it finally came. I was so stressed and worried. And I just want to say...

First off, I didn’t need any of those mean comments. Yes, I’m a real person and yes this is a real situation. So thanks for nothing.

Second off, thank you to all of the beautiful ladies that were actually helpful and not mean, I really just needed 1) someone to talk (I have no one to talk to about this, no mom, no girlfriends), and 2) reassurance that everything was gonna be okay or at least a provided plan of action, that would have been helpful. I definitely didn’t need the bitchy judging, thank you very much. I didn’t need to feel any worse.

I also have obviously learned my lesson, and will be extremely careful with my future shenanigans. But again, thank you to everyone that was actually helpful  💛

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Original Post:

I mean, my boyfriend and I are very frisky together. But I don’t want to have sex yet, so I haven’t invested in birth control. 

We were fooling around the other night, and he tried to go inside of me a little for like half a minute or less (he didn’t get far at all) but honestly it hurt and we stopped. If we ever try anything more it hurts, but we usually stop since I don’t want to have sex yet, like I said. Nothing happened, he didn’t ejaculate. 

But my period is late and it’s making my stomach drop. I’ve always had an irregular period, but this is making me anxious. The days after we fooled around, I even got some of the brown period stains I usually get after my period for a couple days - did that count as having my period?? It doesn’t feel like it counts...

So, I basically want reassurance that I didn’t have real sex and that that’s not how people get pregnant. 

In the future, I’m going to be so much more careful, I hate having to worry about this. I honestly am not ready to be pregnant. I’m in college, but I still have so many things to do before that happens.

So... how much penetration means sex? Or is just fooling around and making each other cum sex? Sex is making love, but does it mean that there is penetration involved? If so, how much penetration is sex? He only went inside for a couple seconds, and then nothing else, that doesn’t sound like sex, and it didn’t feel like sex...

What kinds of sexual actions will get you pregnant? How far in does he have to go? 

Also, I still feel like I haven’t had real sex, what I mentioned above is the most I’ve ever done. I didn’t have sex, right? I can still say “I haven’t had sex” without a guilty conscience?

I hope you guys can assuage my stress. Thanks if you made it through the post 😣

tl;dr How much penetration means sex? What defines “having sex”, after what kind of actions do you change from being able to say “I’ve never had sex” to “I’ve had sex”? Should I be worried about pregnancy if he only went in a little one time then immediately stopped?