What do I do? I don’t know how to feel please help
This happened over a year ago. My whole grad went on a trip to DC. We had to sleep on the bus. It was kinda uncomfortable but we made do. I was siting in a seat with my friend and the guy behind me told me if i wanted I could move back and put my legs a-crossed him so I could b more comfortable and so could my friend. I did it bc that way I could b more comfy. So I fell asleep and maybe about and hour later I wake up and keep in mind I had my blanket wrapped around my legs and his hands were on top of the blanket. When I wake up I feel his hands go under the blanket and I was just kind of like woah stop but I was still like half asleep at this point so I just sort of just tried to go back to sleep. But then he started like rubbing my legs up until he was getting really close to my vagina and butt. I was starting to get like scared and super uncomfortable but I like couldn’t move almost. And then he slowly started getting really close where his pinkie was touching my vagina and then we was touching my butt and vagina. I didn’t know what to do. I was so scared and I felt like crying but I couldn’t say anything. My mind was screaming stop stop! But no words would come out I tried to look at him and at least shake my head no but I couldn’t it took so much but to move my legs even. I wanted to cry So much but I couldn’t even speak. I was now sitting just next to him my legs not on him. We were driving home at night and were supposed to sleep on the way home but I think I got made two hours of sleep that night. I feel like I’m over reacting. I have only told a few friends bc I was tore apart the next day i didn’t know what to do I still don’t I’m shaking that I even wrote out this story. I feel like I’m over reacting bc there are people who have had worse. But I will never forget that emotion the day after it’s something I’ve never felt before. Am I over reacting. Was i sexual assault I’m so confused and also the guy had a girl friend and when I told one of my friends she almost convinced me that maybe it was an accident but I know it wasn’t I looked him it the eyes I know it wasn’t I know how his hands were I am almost in tears right now. Now today I told another friend because she was dating the guy and they broke up but she wanted to get back together with him and i knew if I didn’t tell her something bad might happen, I told her and told her not to tell anyone but she went and told him the guy! I so confused he told her he didn’t do it and that he was only touching my shins and that he wanted to apologize (also on the trip before this happened he added me on Snapchat but a couple days after this incident he unadded me which just tells me he knows what he did I saw him he knows what he did) she told him no thank goodness but I don’t know what to do part of me want to believe I was just over reacting nothing happened and push it all to the back of my brain but the other part of me knows it happened and wants to slap him for lying. Another reason I know he knows if because if someone is saying this about you and it’s not actually true you don’t say oh I just want to apologize no you would be mad because someone is making up something like that. But I’m not mad at her for some reason at all but I also don’t know how to feel about him what do I do I need help.