First time posting. Not really sure if this is the right place but...

I've taken about six pregnancy tests and I am trying really hard not to hallucinate into thinking I saw a line. I figured a few were evap lines but practically every single one looks like there's something there. What breaks my heart is the supposed line never got darker. And tonight I started spotting.

I want to say I'm silly for crying right now; that it's something I wanted to see and not something I actually had, but I felt like I was pregnant. And that feeling of being stuck between not being too excited because it was a long shot (I have

somewhat irregular periods) and not doubting my body (because I like to think I know it well enough) is sooo tiresome. Also infuriating.

I just needed somewhere to post this so I can cry if I want to... Even if I can never confirm if I had my little one or not, I'm just bummed. I was really hoping baby was there. Anyone else on the same boat?

Now I just wait to see if AF shows to try again. Or maybe a sneaky little miracle. We shall see. Baby dust to all and all the hugs.💖

Here's photos for reference. This is almost 2 weeks of testing after missed period.