Please tell me if you can relate, and if this is truly a more common issue than I think:

My guy of 3 years hasn’t had much interest in me physically lately. I know that he watches porn often on his phone, yes I’ve snooped. I hint that I want to have sex and he doesn’t seem to care most of the time, or just ignores my advances. Also it makes me feel silly and undesirable when I continually put myself out there without a response. It’s not like I’m being pushy, just trying to let it be known. I’ve tried an experiment, where I just don’t do anything physical or sexual towards him, and wait for him to make the first move and I’ve ended up disappointed most times.

I’m sorry, I know this sounds mostly like a rant, but it feels good to put it out there. I don’t have anyone to talk to about it.

I’ve questioned him about this behavior in the past, and he just says “I can’t help it if I’m not in the mood” “i just don’t feel like it”. I have given him space and stopped pursuing for a while now and nothing has changed. I don’t know how to phrase it, when I ask him to please consider my needs also...I’m only human.

It’s giving me anxiety and low self esteem.