i need to vent before i go insane.

back in september my husband and i decided to start actually trying for our 3rd(we always have unprotected sex but now i would track everything etc) A couple months go by nothing happens. i start feeling depressed and our marriage starts to suffer. i decided to go back on my anti depressants so i can figure myself out and be content.

so after a little while i start thinking clearly again and i am starting to realize the only time my husband is talking about having another baby is when hes drinking...

and by 2 days after that he is telling me he doesnt want another and i should stop talking about it.

i get myself super excited to have abother little one (pinterest boards, picking names, the whole nine) only to be smacked down every single time

then he has the nerve to question why i am depressed.

im heartbroken and i feel so alone.