ex bf :(

so i miss my first boyfriend and i really shouldn’t. we broke up bc his best friend didn’t like me and he started acting weird and distant AND i knew i was gonna get hurt so i just cut him off. a few months ago he messaged me and was apologizing and explained to me he was “childish” then and how his best friend got arrested so then i realized he only messaged me because his best friend is gone :( he tried to get me to come chill before he left because he was starting a new job. i didn’t trust him and i ended up saying no and blocking him again. i really miss him but i don’t wanna give him another chance because i’m scared of getting or hurt or just plain out looking stupid. someone give me advice:((