emotions

so I was just recently released from a residential facility for depression, my mom has zero trust in me and I'm not even supposed to be on this app or the phone. I have feelings for two males, one I met at the residential facility and the other I've known for a long time and I went to school with, the one that I met at the residential I ran with and we ended up having sex.... I really love both of them and want both to be my boyfriend but neither of them would be okay with another male in the relationship. both boys are very caring and understanding. well I found out that the one I went to school with is out of the question.... but the other one, I'm probably never going to see him again and I just can't do a long distance relationship, I've got to many trust issues