Should I break up with my boyfriend or am I being irrational?

I’ve (23 yrs old) been dating my boyfriend (27yrs) for 5 months now. He is truly my first love. We have great chemistry and I love being around him. However lately, I’ve been thinking a lot and I can’t tell if I’m being irrational or if these are real reasons to break up.

My bf works two jobs. At one he works 3 days a week and they’re 12 hour shifts. There usually 10-10 or 12-12 so it’s the complete opposite of my schedule. The other job has him 2-3 days a week and it’s also 6-12 hour shifts. We also live an hour away so I really only see him 1-2 days a week. I make the drive 95% of the time. I feel like he never appreciates the drive I make to see him.

He knows I work less than him and I feel like he uses that against me. I’ll work a nine hour shift and it’s always “at least it’s not 12” and I mean I get it, it’s not but it still sucks. No matter what I complain about, he has it harder. I don’t want it to be a competition, I just want to vent about work. He always uses the line “well that’s life”. I feel as my SO he should be more caring, it’s not like I complain a lot.

When we fight he always accuses me of cheating or having a back up plan. I’ve never cheated or given him any reason to think that.

He also knows I suffer from depression but when I open up about it I just feel attacked. I told him that I just want him to comfort me but he is so blunt with me. I told him it’s really hard to live with my alcoholic mother and he’s response was “you think I liked living with my mom?”. Like what does that have to do with my situation? Why would that comfort or help me?

When I try to communicate my feelings he just says I’m picking a fight. Which is really frustrating because obviously I just want him to listen to how I feel so we can grow from this.

I just feel like being in a relationship he should show more affection towards me. I want him to ask me to hang out more and I want him to want to see me. I want him to tell me I’m beautiful. When I ask him why he’s with me he gives me some half ass answer. I want him to give me a thoughtful response. It just hurts. I haven’t had many relationships before so am I just picking at stupid small things? I tried talking about this with him and he still hasn’t listened or tried to change. I’m lost. I love him dearly but sometimes i feel like this is never going to change. However, the thought of breaking things off just make me upset and anxious.

I really need some good advice, ladies.