2 months ago I started talking to this amazing guy. He's funny, sarcastic, attentive, amazing... He's everything a Girl Wants basically. My mother gave me some Flack about his weight because he is a bigger guy, but I don't fucking care he's amazing. However, he's also magnetic and I tell myself before I see him I won't do this, I won't say this, I won't tease him. But I do it anyways. He's a huge Cuddlebug and I'm glad I'm one too, but yesterday I stayed at his place. The makeout started out really good and it only got better from there, but before I knew it I was undressed and on my back. I was so hesitant, I was so scared. Because I do not love my body the way I should. I have stretch marks on my hips, my breasts are too big for my body, my tummy is not my favorite place, my thighs are so big. He saw that I was nervous, that I was anxious. He stopped and pulled me up, and he let go of my waist and he held my hands instead, and he looked me straight in the eyes he told me that I was a beautiful person, and that my body it's amazing, that my mind is enticing. That in his mind he sees me as a the most beautiful person. I almost cried. No one in my 20 years of life has ever told me that I was beautiful like that. I nodded my head and told him I accept it, but in my mind I was waging a war in my head, because my mom always told me watch out for guys with smooth words, but in my mind I knew he was sincere and he meant it. Because he looks at me like I am his entire world. Because when he kisses me, he doesn't want to stop. He's always close by and ask me if I'm okay. I catch him staring at me sometimes, and he looks… I can't describe it. I'm afraid though. He's only my second boyfriend and that makes me happy, but also scared. I like him, I adore him, I do not love him. Not yet. I could though. But I'm scared of fucking this up. I'm scared I'm going to hurt him. Because he tells me I'm a sweet person, but I know in my heart I'm guarded and can be cold. I pull away and push away when I'm scared of getting too close… Any advice on anything?