I’m 35 and have 3 kids already - the little one in the oven is #4.

Years ago I volunteered to be a surrogate for my brother (I’m adopted so 0% related). He wasn’t ready then. About 1 1/2 yrs ago I went though 2 failed embryo transfers for him. He blamed me and called me incompetent because he thought the doctor and the clinic he used were flawless and one of the best in southern Cali so naturally I did something wrong 🙄 I refused to help him do a 3rd round because of his behavior. I understand he was extremely disappointed but not cool.

I’ve wanted baby #4 for a few years so since I’m now 35 decide its now it never. I’m 15 wks and have no idea when and how to tell my brother. He thinks the world revolves around him so he will be beyond mad when he finds out. His birthday is coming up in a few weeks. How do I tell him ?! 😟 this is stressing me out and causing me to not enjoy this pregnancy as I should. He’ll think I sabotaged his cycles in order to have my own - I took oral meds and several injections for his cycles - wasn’t fun and had zero appreciation from him.

Should I write a note in his birthday card? Let one of my kids tell him? Just see if he notices? I Can Not tell him in person or by phone 😩

This is ridiculous but stressing me out.