I’ve been trying to conceive 2 years and I can’t help but feel that I am a shell of the person I used to be before this journey. I’ve had 2 miscarriages and 2 chemical pregnancies, I just feel empty. I know people say it will happen but it just makes me so angry because I feel like I have been there 4 times before what makes the next time different.

After my fertile period I instantly thought in defiantly not pregnant this month but one thing I have noticed before is having really weird dreams on my other pregnancies about 5 days past ovulation and I’ve started having them now, I’ve also noticed feeling whiped out (I’m now 8 dpo) same as before.

I am so scared to get my hopes up because I don’t want to be hurt again, I feel like I can’t be happy about anything until I know.

Oh and I am getting married the day I am due on 😡