Tackling Misconceptions - The oppression of women in Islam.

Okay, here goes. I echo a lot of what you said about people’s opinions based on how we look. I used to really let it bother me how people felt when they saw me in hijab, particularly the point about lack of education that you mentioned, and it wasn’t until much later on that I realised I was somehow seeking approval from people who didn’t even matter. The women I’ve met at the mosque have really helped me with that realisation, just by seeing their pwn confidence. Now, I have a very different view. I try my best to go out in hijab to the places where you rarely see Muslims, at least where we live. Like the local forest, country parks and other outdoorsy places. I get looks from some people, sure, but I feel good that I’m out there showing people that Muslim women aren’t the stereotypical uneducated housewives controlled by their husbands. I CAN wear a pair of wellies and splash in the puddles with my son! Islam doesn’t forbid us from having fun haha!One of the hardest things for me though has been what my own family thought about Muslim women. I remember my dad texting me to say they’d just read Muslim women aren’t allowed to visit their own families after marriage!!! I was shocked that they would even consider this to be true! They still haven’t seen me in hijab apart from the odd photograph, although I’m hoping to tackle that after Ramadan, starting with a blog post. What I love about women in Islam is how well respected we are. Muslim men treat me so differently than the men I knew before, in a good way. I also love how the role of the mother in raising children is celebrated, and the care we receive as a result. I know women outside of Islam often feel that gender equality means like-for-like opportunities and roles. I think Islam is far more honest and beautiful in its recognition that men and women have different strengths and abilities. Women are the best placed to raise their children, and therefore they don’t have to work if they don’t want to. But I also love that this is a choice for individual women - that we absolutely can work if we want to. Khadijah RA, the Prophet’s SAW first wife, is an amazing example of this. Luckily, I didn’t pay much attention to the media before meeting my husband and, living in rural England, knew literally no Muslims, so I never really had any misconceptions. I just hadn’t thought about it at all. On meeting my husband, Islam was introduced from scratch and the women in his family were so kind, welcoming and well-educated that it never crossed my mind there should be any problem. It was only after becoming Muslim myself that I really noticed the negativity.I think Muslim women in particular have a big role to play in curbing public opinion of Islam. I understand completely why some women stay more sheltered at home and prefer not to put themselves out there, but personally I just think it’s something we have a duty to do. Besides terrorism, women’s rights, or lack thereof, is one the biggest misconceptions of Islam and people will never change their opinions if we don’t show them the reality. I try to tell myself every time I’m having a day where I’m nervous to go somewhere in hijab - if I don’t have that courage in that particular place, I miss a golden opportunity. I think women like Nadia Hussain from Bake Off are spot on - she’s out there in hijab, not talking necessarily about Islam, but showing people that Muslim women can work, have hobbies and have a laugh too! We need more of these kinds of women in the public eye in my view.

When I first truly accepted Islam as my religion, I didn’t think past the love I had for my Creator, Tabarak Wa Ta’ala. So when I began to come across things about my role as a woman in Islam, I momentarily shut down. It’s quite embarrassing that I even thought this stuff was true, but I want to address some real misconceptions. So I will mention them anyway.1 - I thought a man could beat his wife, because of an ayah I read from the Qur’an. It did not at the time occur to me that the Qur’an MUST be interpreted, along with additional information provided from Hadith. Turns out, a man can hit his wife equivalent to striking her with a feather. A feather!! And even to do this, she must be going completely astray. I have yet to read any restrictions regarding this matter, from a woman to a man.2 - I thought men were entitled to so much more reward, by means of jumu’ah, performing salah in the masjid, eid salah, etc. But then I read ahadith that taught me that a woman earns just as much reward by praying alone, taking care of her home and her husband. SubhanAllah, a woman is entitled to at least as much reward without even having to leave her home. Which makes us more likely to attain this reward, as in this busy age, our men often struggle to make it to the masjid for every salah. 3 - It seemed unfair me that a wife should not refuse her husband sex. I went on to learn that not only can a woman refuse, with reason. But also that Allah Ta’ala is Just and has balanced this - a man is expected to please his wife until she is completely satisfied. 4 - It bothered me that jannah is full of rewards for men, not women. Turns out that very few rewards of jannah are actually revealed to us. And those that are revealed to us have been subject to various interpretations. But the one thing Allah Ta’ala has told us that is clear and not open to interpretation, is that He is Al-Adl, The Utterly Just. So we trust in this and know that we will never feel unhappy or jealous with our rewards in jannah. And personally, I am not interested in any reward of jannah, other than the reward of seeing Allah Ta’ala and being close to Him. InshaAllah! Some cultures, that happen to be Muslim dominated, are unfortunately oppressive to women. It’s really upsetting that they do treat women as inferior beings. And it’s incredibly important to recognise that Islam holds women in a completely different light to these cultural norms. Muslim women are to be loved, protected and respected. Some cultures even deny women an education, and try to justify this with religion. A huge part of our religion is in seeking knowledge. And my absolute favourite example is of Hadhrat Aisha (RA) who is not only officially recognised as a scholar, but as THE greatest scholar in the history of Islam. The fact that a woman is granted such a title, over so many amazing male contenders, demonstrates the clear, recognised strength of women in Islam.Hadhrat Khadija RA was one of the four greatest women in Islam. She was a huge feminist, an incredibly successful business woman, a perfect wife and she had such a close spiritual bond with Allah Ta’ala. She is my ultimate role model.My take on equality in Islam: The western world recognises gender equality as whatever men can do, so can women. And vice versa. This is great, but oversimplified, in my opinion. Allah Ta’ala created man and woman. He knows each of us, our capabilities and our attributes best. If we were expected to be and do the same, then He would have created one type of human, not two. So we are granted equality according to our strengths and weaknesses, how we were created and our roles. The point about sex that I have mentioned above is a perfect example, showing how our needs differ to those of men. But both needs have been catered to equally.There is one situation where I feel the scale could be tipping towards women. Though I do not believe this falls into an argument of equality, as the significance of this this role is beyond justified. And this is the status of a mother. How blessed a mother is in her existence, subhanAllah. A mother carries jannah beneath her feet, her prayers are answered because there is no heart more sincere than that of a mother, we are obligated to respect, love and care for our mothers. And then follow the virtues of breastfeeding and raising a child. SubhanAllah. May Allah Ta’ala bless us all with beautiful babies and make us the best mothers, InshaAllah.

I love this quote as it so beautifully summarises a woman's status in Islam 😊

https://www.thereligionofpeace.com/pages/quran/women-worth-less.aspxBefore you go to this website, I just want to clear up a few things! This website is one source that compiled a lot of Islamophobia and hatred. I am not sharing this because it lines up with my views. I wanted to share this website because the second I came across it in my own research, I understood this organization reflects a lot of misconceptions and hatred that many people may have about Islam. It also provides Qur’anic and Hadith “evidence” to back up its claims. Any person unfamiliar with Islam who read this may have the chance of being negatively shaped by a source such as this. I think it important to look at the ugliest and most aggressive opinions to find some light, because enlightenment and knowledge in general can be gleaned from many misleading sources if one is willing to dig past the hate or general darkness.Now, my biggest questions for this thread include: How would you respond to the statements this website makes? Are there misinterpretations occurring here? Have you personally experienced people who have used similar arguments in aggressive manners? Some quotes and suggestions from this website supposedly enabled by Islam:“Sexism is mathematically established.”“Allah felt that a man's testimony in court should be valued twice as highly as a woman's...”Men are above women, from Qur’anWomen are unclean in Islam.“A man has dominion over his wives' bodies as he does his land.”“ A man is permitted to take women as sex slaves outside of marriage.”Women are deficient in their intelligence.“Allah has made women deficient in the practice of their religion as well, by giving them menstrual cycles.”Women are the majority occupants of Hell and are more likely to go to Hell just because they are women.A’isha, Prophet Mohammad’s wife, complained of women’s roles in Islam. [PBU them both.]In response to Islamic feminist or Islamic apologists on these matters:“Still, it is somewhat telling that Islam's treatment of women can only be defended by contrasting it to an extremely primitive environment in which women were said to be non-entities...”Honestly, there are a lot of people who would find justification and legitimacy in this author’s claims, whether or not those claims are made out of context, etc, and I think it is important to have an awareness and mindfulness of such claims.I think people who have already responded to this thread offer wonderful responses to the role of women in Islam, but I wanted to offer all of those ugly and aggressive claims for closer examination and to raise awareness of the extent of these claims. I don’t know if everyone I mentioned here could be responded to in just the reply comments of this post, so feel free to make a separate post if you have a lot to say or want to break down more of this material. Feel free to bring up experiences where you have came across individuals who have approached you with similar material against Islam, and the ‘oppression’ of women by Islam. After I had returned from Morocco and had family members asking me questions about my significant other, I had an uncle who attempted to talk about the supposed oppression of women by Islam in front of my whole family, and though I didn’t have all of the answers to his statements right away, I didn’t back down and repeatedly spoke of my personal experiences with Muslims in Muslim majority countries and in the US that did not reflect his claims whatsoever. For some people you come across, personal experience isn’t always enough, and being able to support more scholarly/academic claims is safer territory to function within during a debate so you can call upon a larger collection of narratives and knowledge.

Amazing topic! I will be forming my answer in between toddler entertainment today haha!