So im a 19 year old girl, and in the past I have struggle with watching pornography and masturbating. i stopped about 7-8 months ago, and porn repulses me now. I've been feeling so lost the past few weeks, i feel like i cant hear from God, like I'm not good enough or faithful enough to. I just feel so lost. Well, I just masturbated for the first time since I stopped months ago. I didn't watch porn, and I wasnt even thinking about anything, it was purely physical. I feel so so so stupid that I did it. I was even thinking while I was doing it "just stop now, your gonna regret it instantly afterwards" and I still did it. I just feel so dumb and unworthy right now. I cant seem to get straight with the lord. I've been rejected from 4 different jobs already and I just feel lost and confused and like I cant do anything right. I'm just so discouraged and i really need some encouragement. if any of you have struggled with this before or even just have a word to give me, i would really really appreciate it. i feel so so so dumb that i did this.