I think I was raped. It was years ago when I was 15. I got drunk at a party and passed out in my "friends" room. This friend I have known literally my entire life, my brothers best friend in fact and I always looked to him as an older brother. It was him and his gf party so I felt safe to drink, I just knew he would protect me if anything were to happen. Heres where it gets hazey and I don't really remember. I had passed out and at some point it felt like someone was touching me but I was too drunk to move, then it kinda felt like someone moved my clothes and well... I think I felt something in me, and I say "I think" because I was really sooo drunk plus half asleep. I was a virgin and I don't remember it hurting though so I'm still to this day not sure of what happened. I've never spoken about it before and I'm still friends with that person and idk why I'm writing this but I feel like I needed to finally get it off my chest. I also want to add that the main reason I feel like it really did happen is because of the weeks that followed, even though I kept kept telling myself that there's no way that could have happened and that he would never violate me like that, I was really emotionally damaged. I cried everyday and I felt so disgusting. I've been watching 13 reasons why and the part about Jessica and Bryce Bryce just felt so familiar it made me cry and kind of relive it. I honestly never understood "trigger warning" until I watched that episode.