Is my bf controlling or protecting me?
So my best friend was recently deployed during the fall semester of college. Due to his job description, outside contact is prohibited except when he is allowed to do so. Every once in a while I send him texts or emails updating him and checking on him so that when he is allowed to check, he can escape the harshness of being deployed.
Yesterday after 4 months, he randomly called me and we talked for about two hours before he had to go back to work. I updated him on life and caught up with him. (He unfortunately can’t tell me anything due to his job description). It was a nice , needed conversation between two friends.
My bf wasn’t too happy about it at first. He said if he were on the phone with a female that I would lose my shit. That he’s not “allowed” to have female friends. Here’s the deal.. he did have female friends, but the conversations were a way over the “friendship” line. Me as a person, it takes A LOT for me to flip, and I don’t just over bullshit either.
I told him straight up what was said in the conversation between my friend and I. I felt like maybe he was jealous? He definitely wanted to know if I mentioned to my friend that I was in a relationship (which I did). He later apologized but I feel it was forced and not genuine. I want to be trusting of him, but the he screwed me over before and I’m kind of still on guard when it comes to “friends”.
Obviously any SO is going to have friends of the opposite sex, it’s realistic. I’m not dumb nor controlling in that manner. But I’m still learning to get over the fact that his “friend” was not just a friend when we were together. ( no sexual contact just REALLY flirtatious messages on BOTH sides.. she knew he was with me and obvi he knew he was with me).
I guess I’m looking for an outside opinion. Am I wrong for have answering my friends call? Am I wrong for having bouts of doubt with my bf?