Am I being stupid

The guy that I’m basically in love with and although I didn’t lose my virginity to him, I lost myself to him. He became my best friend and he gives me all the signs that I’m more than a friend, we’ve known each other for almost 3 years now. We’ve slept together and spend a lot of time together but ever since school let you he hasn’t talked much to me and I feel like I only mattered to him when I was back in college. We don’t live in the same state but have made plans to see each other over the summer break. Next semester he will be at a new school in a different state, it breaks my heart but I want him to do what’s best for him. Am I begging stupid for basically waiting on him to voice to me that he wants me? I get very emotional about this topic because my mind says one thing while my heart says another... PLEASE HELP 😭