Heartbroken and lost

Christina

I'm 9 weeks today but on Thursday the 31st at 8 weeks and 4 days I had my first OB appointment. They did a transvaginal ultrasound sound and told me my baby stopped growing the week before (which it measured a week behind at 6 weeks and 5 days) and no longer had a heartbeat.

On May 23rd I heard my babys heartbeat and it was strong but it wasn't measuring what it should be. I was happy though because I heard its little heart. Today I'm still lost and confused with how I could be told "everything looks good" and a week later my baby has no heartbeat.

I've done everything right, I ate well, I cut caffeine, I started walking more and yet my baby is gone. My body still hasn't recognized the loss so I have to make a decision about how I want to proceed with this Missed miscarriage. I'm afraid to do the D/C because of the risk of scaring and I'm also scared of taking the Misoprostol because it can cause my uterus to rupture because I've had a c-section in the past.

All I want is my baby back and this is not fair.