My boyfriend and I have been together for about 8 months now, and this relationship is wonderful. He’s not only my boyfriend but my best friend, we have so much fun with and without and each other and still love each other just as much at the end of the day. I live with him now, mostly because of my living situation in the last few months has been crazy and I had been staying with him so much anyways, he invited me to stay there with him anyways. Things have been wonderful living together. Though our love life is pretty spectacular in my opinion, of course there are also some flaws.

In the past couple of months, there has been some change in... well everything. He has become less affectionate with me, he never says he loves me anymore unless I’m the one to say it first, and he doesn’t EVER want to have sex EVER.

He was in the army for five years and got out in I think 2015. I know and have heard that there are plenty (if not a majority of them) of solders that after they come home, have a lot of different triggered issues, which is more than understandable, and one of the big ones I’ve come across in research was ED (erectile dysfunction). For a good period of time, he blamed his ED for his lack of motivation, but every time he thought he wasn’t going to get hard, I proved him wrong. From what I’ve seen so far, that isn’t part of the problem

At the beginning of our relationship as well and sometimes still, he also did small amount of cocaine. When we first got together, alongside what I’m sure was the excitement of a new relationship, he fucked me a lot also (I think) because he was high in coke, too. But he hasn’t done it recently, and the very last time he did do it was the first time in coke that he refused sex with me.

I talked to him again and he said that he has literally just been lazy, so I took it as a “well, maybe in another couple of days”. And that couple of days turned into weeks then about a month and a half. I’ve been really deprived and I get pissed off internally when he makes me think he’s trying to tease me or get me riled up when really he’s just wanting to tickle me.

Today, he said that he feels bad that he can’t “please he girl” and said he wants to make changes... but what’s still getting me is how he still believe it’s ED and not just him being a lazy but 😣 I don’t know what to think, how to feel. He said he may leave me because of his guilt. I checked his phone to see if he’s been cheating on me and he’s not, believe me I looked through that baby. I just need some insight 😔 I want ideas on how I can make it work and what I can possibly do to help him, if there’s anything at all I can do. Mostly, I just need support cause this has also gotten my esteem down a lot 😔 sorry for the long post girlies 💕