So my husband and i had a few rough couple of weeks. He always used to call me whenever he left work or went anywhere when he wasn’t with me. While lately he’s been keeping his phone off and when it’s on he won’t answer the phone. It’s really only happened this week that it became a problem. On Sunday i went to a baby shower and he had his phone turned off the entire day and instead of enjoying the one day i had with my best friend celebrating this special time i was worried if something happened to him. Long story short he was at my mothers house and i went off on him. So eventually i thought my concerns were addressed and we had moved on. On Monday i went to his family’s home (which they’re not the nicest they’re the type of inlaws that have their nose in the air) and everyone kept asking me if i was pregnant because “i put on a some weight” (now you guys know why i try to stay away from his family) So then fast forward to today he told me he was going to come home early which is usually anywhere from 1pm-3pm. I called his work and they said he left. I called his mom and she asked why i was looking for him and i said because i felt sick and need medication and she said “are you sure you’re not pregnant?” I laughed it off and said “no I’m not pregnant” and she said “I’m just saying its your problem not mine.” So afterwards i called his phone multiple times and they went to voicemail. So apparently his coworker said that he left with his father and an out of town relative. Which I wasn’t mad about that but i was mad that i couldn’t get ahold of my husband when his wife is in a new area (i moved for him) in a new place, with no car and no way to get a hold of him if something happened while everyone i know lives an hour and a half away. So he comes home at 7pm (late) and he starts acting like nothing happened and he started play fighting around with me and i got mad and said “go kick rocks you didn’t answer my phone all day I’m so mad at you. You need to go sleep at your mothers house” (which i always say that in a less serious manner) Then he put his elbow at my neck aggressively i almost couldn’t breathe on the couch and then i said “stop” and the he told me “you go kick some fucking rocks don’t tell me to kick rocks. Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to” and I’ve never seen him use physical action towards me. Not to mention he’s been telling me to shut the fuck up a lot this week and we never curse at each other. The only thing he’s said to me this week was “be on the ball about our house.” (Aka keep the house clean) which hurt my feelings because i constantly clean after him and he just keeps remaking a mess. So then i was on my phone just because i didn’t know what to do in the situation and i said “I’m going to call my brother to come pick me up to sleep a night at my moms house.” And he goes “this is your home now.” So he took my phone and asked me if i wanted to go where he was going and i said no and i asked for my phone back which he didn’t give at first but eventually did. So i ended up calling my mother and balling my eyes out and she said she’ll see me in two days to talk to me about it. What do you guys think i should do? I’m 19 and he’s 28. I feel like a little girl who wants to crawl in her mothers bed so she can make it all go away.

UPDATE****

He came home an hour later and i had packed a bag just to show him how serious his actions were because he tends to never admit or right his wrongs. So he comes and sits next to me and says “where do you think you’re going?” “Are those clothes packed for tomorrow? Are you leaving tomorrow” but in a (yeah ok type tone) so i remained quiet. He got up and went to the room to sleep. Now I’m making my coffee with my eyes watery wandering if he still loves me the way i do him because if roles were switched I’d cling onto him and make him stay. I feel completely undesirable, alone, vulnerable and insecure.

UPDATE NUMBER 2****

i went in the room to again tell him I’m leaving just to make sure he didn’t want me not to leave and he said “why” yelling and i said “because i think we need space and i don’t think laying your hands on me is right.” Then he went back to sleep as if he asked only out of curiosity. A few hours later i woke him up and said “babe i need money” and all he said was “you’re good.” As in i don’t care if you need money, get on with your life. I officially called my brother to pick me up so i can sleep in my moms bed. (She’s out of state)

P.S if you want to stay updated i suggest commenting so you can receive notifications. Thank you everyone who is helping me sort this out by weighing out the good and the bad.

UPDATE #3

UPDATE #4

He texted me saying “have fun with your brother.” Then he called me off a different number and he said “why didn’t you tell me you left, i woke up 2am to find my wife not here” and i instantly bawled my eyes out and he said “why are you crying” and i couldn’t gather the words to say anything so all he could hear was my crying breaths and pants. It felt sad and I’m sure it sounded sad. I then told him “i told you two or three times before i left.” He said “i was sleeping. You were quick to answer a number you didn’t know.” So i kept silently crying until i said “you keep telling me to shut the fuck up. You treated me like a side piece. I have never felt so insecure, and scared when you put your hands on me.” Then he said “but you’ve been having an attitude.” Then i said “i get an attitude because you treated me like a worker when i came to HELP you at work. Then when i told you to stop you said leave me then.” Then he said “at least tell me when you leave.” Then i said “bye (husbands name)” and hung up.