Young marriage?

Question

So I’m 19 and my boyfriend is 23. Both of us are in the Army and are stationed at the same base. We’ve been together 7 months and he wants to get married. My mom doesn’t support us getting married so soon and I don’t have a problem with marriage, I just want to wait since I’m young and we haven’t been together for too long. He’s getting ready to get out of the Army next year and he just wants us to be together all the time and get the benefits married couples get. We had a conversation about it and I told him I don’t want to get married just for benefits and he understands but he doesn’t want to wait since we both know that we want to stay together. At some point in the discussion he even said “if i have to wait years or months to get married what’s the point of being together.” After he said that I stopped talking to him for awhile and he apologized and said he’s just scared that I won’t feel the same for him within a year or so... I just don’t know what to do anymore.

Answer

Im 19 and my husband is 20 and we been together for 4 years and got married before he left for basic and we currently are in fort drum and enjoying life and having a baby coming in August . Age doesnt matter . If you both love each other get married . You both are old enough to make your own decisions

Answer

My husband and I dated six months before getting married at 19 and 18 (turning 20 and 19). We’ve been married for eleven years. We do not regret it. No one was against us getting married, but got the annoying young marriages do not last. Do whatever you feel in your heart is right, to hell with what other people say. If you want to wait then your boyfriend should be understanding, if you want to get married then those around you who don’t support it will have to get use to it.  
As far as how did we know it was right for us, we could not see ourselves without each other. My husband would come sleep at my apartment, while I was at work just so he could kiss me goodbye on my way out the door and so I could kiss him goodbye on his way out. Day shift vs night shift. Even then I would bring him supper or snacks while he was at work. We still feel that way about each other eleven years later.

Answer

Unfortunately it’s very common for couples to get married young when one or both of them is in the military, for the benefits (housing, medical, etc). 
It’s also very common for those marriages to end in divorce within a few years.

Answer

If you feel you dont want to get married because you’re young, don’t do it. I was 24 and my husband was 30 when we got married and we had known each other for like 2 years prior. He’s always telling me about the younger married dudes He works with and how they get married for the wrong reasons, cheat, dislike their wives and get divorced. I get that it’s different for some younger people, but if you’re questioning it, that probably means something is a little off. Follow your gut. Marriage is not easy and the military makes it so much harder. Don’t rush into things. And it seems to me that he wants to rush into it because he wants the benefits. Idk, I wouldn’t do it if I were you.

Answer

Here’s my story:
My husband and I (he’s 21 and I am 22) decided to get married 5 months into our relationship mostly because he was going to be deployed a few months later (luckily it was cancelled). We decided mostly to do it for the benefits so I could focus on school without stressing about my job (I was working full time plus a part time job to afford school and rent) while he was gone and we’d be able to pay rent and everything close to base (pricing for off base housing is more expensive towards base and towards campus which you can’t afford on a single BAH alone). We also knew we wanted to be together for the rest of our lives. Our parents were distant about the idea at first but now they’re happy that we’re happy. 
All in all, you need to decide if that’s what you both want and that you’ll BOTH be okay with only one income (if he decides to stay at home for whatever reason) and how your monthly budget/spending habits are. My husband and I are 6 weeks pregnant and I don’t plan on going back to work until our child is in kinder UNLESS I absolutely have to. This works for us because we can make it work with just his income (he’s an E3, will be promoted to E4 by the time our baby arrives). Just make sure to sit down and talk about everything, see a financial counselor and bring in your monthly bills and your LES statements to get an outside perspective on your spending. Getting married is a big thing and knowing how to budget your family especially under one income is a BIG thing.

Answer

My husband is active duty navy and we dated for 2 1/2 years prior to getting married, I even moved from WA to HI to be with him without a ring. I got a job in HI and moved before he came home from deployment. He could stay where y’all are stationed if he really wants to be together, tell him your concerns and you want to take it slow. There’s so much out there we got married at 24 & 25 and it was a good age for us both. We both had partied and had our flings before we were just ready to settle down with each other! But devils advocate sometimes time doesn’t mean anything and people get divorced. Follow your heart and your gut!

Answer

If his response is," if we have to wait to get married, what's the point of being together.".....he isn't ready for marriage and the commitment it brings. You mentioned that he spoke about benefits. Yeah, I'd say it would end in disaster. If you're not ready, you're not ready and that's that. I'd recommend a break from this relationship or slowing things down greatly.

Young marriage?

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