I've been dating my boyfriend for over a year now. I feel like he could be the love of my life. He's the greatest guy, we trust each other, and laugh a lot together.

But with my anxiety I tend to worry a lot and sometimes I get down on myself.

Before we met, I was talking to this guy from my college I had a crush on. We talked for a while and ended up hooking up one night. He then ghosted me which was upsetting but I got over it. Before that I was raped, and was struggling with my self worth/ ideas about sex so I kind of think that's why it happened.

I just worry that since we all attend the same school (but the other guy doesn't live on campus so he isn't around much) that what if they eventually meet? My bf knows about my past and has given me so much trust. I love him more than anything.

But sometimes I think I'm a bad person. I never would have done it if I knew I would meet the love of my life. At the time, I was extremely troubled because of my rape and making poor choices trying to cope. I just feel so ashamed. Not to slut shame- I'm just worried about hurting my bf, even though he does know. I've been upfront about my past but I worry about what'll happen if they were to eventually like meet or something. I'm just so scared of losing my boyfriend and I love him so much but I get so down in myself sometimes. I really need some words of advice or wisdom right now. Thank you ❤️