Struggling with facing IVF

After 4 failed <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a>'s this is our next step. We conceived our child 5 years ago without issues so I really don't understand why we can't conceive naturally. We have both checked out fine and TTC for 2.5 years now. Facing <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IVF</a> has given me a ton of anxiety. I am completely terrified to take all of those meds and of course the financial part of it too (Waiting to hear back from clinic with insurance check) and the big kick in the gut if we do this and it doesn't work. How did you guys feel on the medications? I'm so overwhelmed & becoming depressed. This is not the life I pictured for us and I just don't understand why it can't happen naturally. I didn't even handle Clomid well & still have constant hot flashes. My last <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a> was in February. Soooo scared to go through with this